You Can Love Once Again
by softgentle
Summary: Hermione is in her 6th year at hogwarts and severus is still teaching. They are brought together by strange circumstances but will they find happiness together? Love is a complicated thing for a teenager and a man who loved once before, to understand.
1. Chapter 1

The Hogwarts castle was, as always, busy with its inhabitants going about their day. By evening the castle would be silent with the prefects and teachers going about their rounds without making a sound. After the invasion of Sirius black several years ago, the security had been increased massively. One of the girls sat in Gryffindor tower was combing through her bushy hair making it even poufier. Unsurprisingly she had a book in her lap and was reading whilst trying to her tame her hair. I don't think there was ever a time in which Hermione granger did not have a book with her.

In the dungeons there was a tall man, dressed all in black. Despite the late hour he was still cleaning up with the remains of Longbottom's latest disaster. He summoned the boy to detention to clean it only to find him in the hospital wing after falling down the stairs on his way to fetch the cleaning supplies. The tall man dressed in black, huffed and began to clean up the dreadful mess. I think this was the only time Severus Snape ever cleaned up after his students.

Hermione had recently returned to Hogwarts for her sixth year and so far harry had impressed Slughorn in Defence against the dark arts. Whilst Ron had been trying his best to stay awake and Hermione had been doing so well in all her classes that even Severus had been impressed with her work. He openly admitted that _Miss Granger was a high achiever_ but he would never go further than that to any individual, even to Dumbledore. The truth was that she was beginning to grow on him. He would find himself constantly looking at her at mealtimes and looking for her whenever he was library, even if it was to only look at her for a second while she writing staying out of her sight.

Severus never really had any romantic interests after Lilly had died but now he was becoming very affectionate towards Miss Granger. He just wished showing her his feelings were sanction able for a teacher. He wouldn't say that he loved Miss Granger but he certainly cared for her in a way that was distinctly different to the way he cared about Lilly. When he loved Lilly he felt as though he wanted to be with her every minute of everyday but when he thought of Hermione he just wanted her to do the best she possibly could without giving him a second thought.

After teaching Hermione for the best part of six months into her sixth year, Severus was beginning to wonder what had happened to him. He had developed almost a high school crush on Hermione and he thought it was best to tell Dumbledore because he knew he would never allow a teacher to become so infatuated with a student. One afternoon Dumbledore called for Severus to discuss their next move regarding the dark lord. Severus knew that albus was dying as a result of one of the horcruxes so he didn't really have much to lose. Plus he wanted to make sure that he made the most of his time with albus as he knew that it was limited and he relished his advice.

"Ahh Severus," Albus greeted him his usual way. "Do you have any news for me? I know you've been irritated lately but I'm sure we will have our moment soon enough."

"Albus," He started, sitting down. "Can I tell you something in the utmost confidence?"

Dumbledore looked up and his face was astonished; Dumbledore had kept Severus' double life, kept Harry safe for Severus, looked after his secret about his love for Lilly...was he really asking if he could trust him?

"Severus, I cannot even begin to comprehend as to why you would even think about doubting my trust after all these years."

"It's just that...my love for Lilly is fading."

This got Dumbledore's attention straight away. Never since the day had he first met Severus, did Dumbledore ever consider that Severus' love for Harry's mother would fade.

"Why?"

All Severus had to do was look into Albus' eyes for him to understand. Once Albus had moved his eyes away, deep in thought, Severus looked at his hands in his lap.

"What's her name Severus?"

"I will never tell you, I cannot bring her to any harm or ridicule because I care for her so."

"How old is she?" Albus asked much quieter than before.

"Young," Severus said as his eyes went to the window, glazed over. "So young...so vulnerable...so beautiful...so perfect" He suddenly snapped back to the conversation he was having with Albus and then looked ashamed of how he felt. In truth Albus didn't care how Severus felt about Lilly or any other woman for that matter but he needed to make sure that he was focused when it came to his role as a spy for the order.

"Is this going to interfere with the work you do for me, Severus?"

"Most definitely"

"Then we need to do something but I can't help you if you don't tell me who it is. Maybe we can find a corner to cut or maybe even wipe the memory of this woman from your mind."

"NO...I lost Lilly 16 years ago, I won't lose her too."

Albus went to say something but an owl flying in through the window stopped him. He was carrying a letter with a ministry wax seal. As soon as the letter was out of the bird's beak, he flew off again without waiting around for a treat or water. Albus opened it, knowing the ministry wouldn't have sent it by owl unless it was urgent. Severus huffed and crossed one leg over the other. Albus couldn't believe what he was reading...not knowing what to say he handed the letter to Severus.

 _Dear Albus_ _Percival Wulfric Brian_ _Dumbledore_ _,_

 _It has come to the attention of the ministry that the squib population has been on the increase whilst the number of able witches and wizards is decreasing. Therefore the minister for magic has decided to pass a law that should help to increase the numbers to benefit the wizarding community._

 _The ministry will instruct a select few of witches and wizards to marry and produce children. This selection will be based on the opinion of the department of family and marriage. Should a Hogwarts student be selected, they will be free to continue their education with the institution, providing they meet the criteria that are expected of them._

 _You should also note that this also affects any unmarried members of staff. We reserve the right to bring any student or member of staff to the ministry for marriage purposes or ministry approved appointments._

 _Hoping you are well,_

 _Amelia Bones_

This was unheard of for the ministry. They had actually created a law that would give them the right to order people on who they are going to marry. Severus couldn't take it in; he had just accepted his affection for Hermione Granger and now there was a chance that it could all be taken away. Was he to always lose against another man? Worse of all was that this time, the man who marry the woman he loved may not even love her.

Hermione of course had no knowledge of this and was currently studying in her room, despite the fact she hadn't be assigned any homework yet. When Ginny came into the room later on and found her friend with her nose in a book, she wasn't surprised. She knew Hermione's character well enough to know that she could strip naked and parade around the room and Hermione wouldn't be in the least bit interested.

After around an hour of sitting in stone cold silence, Ginny sprang up a conversation.

"Do you think Snape will ease off this year?" She asked Hermione.

"I can't see it happening, even though you, me, Harry and Ron know about his past, I don't think he's going to be in the least bit lenient." She answered, looking up from her book for the first time in an hour.

"You'd think he would give a little credit to the teenagers who saved his life," Ginny said leaning back against the headboard carefully watching Hermione's face as she answered.

"I didn't save his life Gin," She replied carefully. "I just gave him a sleeping drought and took him to the hospital wing."

"But if you hadn't, he would have been killed by Lupin or the womping willow"

Hermione had admitted to Ginny that she had kept a close eye on Professor Snape, since Lupin's little mishap during the confrontation of Sirus black and peter Pettigrew. He threw himself in front of his charges and then got pushed to the ground with Hermione knocking them both out. Ron was too scared to notice this and ran off back to the castle and harry ran to help his godfather. Hermione saw a lot of blood coming from Snape's head and then gave him a sleeping drought to make sure he wouldn't wake up and took him straight to the hospital wing. After a sincere thank you note and hint of gratefulness, things returned to normal. But Hermione couldn't get him out of her head after that.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey guys, I've read the reviews and just quickly...I did try to put page/chapter divides in the writing but for some reason they wouldn't save in the final publication. So I will use full stops instead and hopefully I will have some success with that** **anyhoo enjoy!**

Hermione was on her way to her potions class with Ginny. Their potions class was the last one their agenda for the week and by the Friday afternoon, they were ready for the weekend. After deciding to give Snape the benefit of the doubt on account of this being her first lesson with him since returning to Hogwarts, Hermione was skipping off to class in the hopes he would be different with his conduct. However, after believing he would change each year when she returned, it was looking as though it would a lost cause.

After they sat down and began to get their books out, Snape stormed out of his office and waved his wand, slamming all the windows and shutters, completely shut. It was pitch black in the room and none of the students dared to perform a lumos charm, knowing there must be a reason behind the sudden actions. Snape performed a lumos charm and started to walk around lighting the student's burners for their cauldrons.

"Now you will be tested on your ability to brew a simple sleeping draught in the dark," Snape began. "Consider this to be a provisional test in preparation for the real one next lesson. Now as you all are aware, a light charm exists called lumos, hence what I'm currently using. You may choose to use lumos however, if you do you must keep your wand in your hand therefore, you must decide...would you like to see and have difficulty in brewing by having only one spare hand, or would you prefer to brew in the dark, having both hands available. BEGIN"

Ginny lit her wand straight away, not even considering the alternative. Hermione thought there must be catch here somewhere and so decided to brew in the dark using the minimal light from everyone else's wands. She may be wrong but then it clicked.

 _Each potion has to be a certain colour, the test will be on how close the potion is to necessary concentration and colour. He is teaching us to pay attention to the timing of the brew rather than relying on the colour!_ Hermione thought to herself. She was certain she had cracked it. It was true that while Slughorn was teaching potions, she received several rewards; there would no such luxury coming from professor Snape. But she could do her best to try

After sneakily using Ginny's charm to see the ingredients, she had finished before everyone else had done. Some of the students had seen that Granger had not used her wand for light and so copied her, but most had been ultimate failures. After the potions had been bottled and placed on Snape's desk, it was clear that Hermione had faired differently than the rest. Whilst her potion was bright orange she worried herself as everyone else's was a light, almost watery orange. Whilst sitting at his desk, Snape noticed this and picked up Ginny's along with Hermione's.

"Let us see how Miss Granger has fared, seeing as she loves bright colour so very dearly," he sneered. "Miss Chang and Mr...Malfoy please step up and pick your tester."

Cho and Draco looked at each other oddly and stood and went to choose their testers. Cho with Ginny's and Draco with Hermione's; after staring at Snape for a millisecond, he motioned for them to drink muttering _fools_ under his breath. Less than a minute later, Draco had collapsed to the floor snoring with contented sleep and Cho was stood completely still with no effects of the intended potion. With a wave of his wand Draco was wake and rushed to his feet feeling immensely embarrassed, they returned to their seats and Snape immediately dismissed the class without another word. Hermione, being the last to leave, was stunned when her potions professor asking her to stay for a quiet word.

"Yes sir?" She asked, looking at him leaning back on his desk.

"You did exceptionally today Miss Granger," He said without ridicule. "I am very pleased to see your development going so well."

"Thank you professor, I have been trying to improve where I can."

"To be honest Miss Granger, I wouldn't be surprised if you passed all your exams with outstandings before Christmas."

"I don't think that would be possible professor." She replied with a smile and to her surprise she was given a smile in return.

"You are a talented witch, Hermione." He said softly. "It's time you realised it."

"Thank you sir," she blushed.

"Miss Granger," He said slightly regretfully. "I was in the headmaster's office several nights ago and whilst I was there he received a letter. It was from Amelia Bones."

Hermione's eyes shot up to his and asked, "From the ministry?" She received a nod in reply.

"The letter stated that the ministry was planning to introduce a law that will apparently increase the able witch and wizard population to our advantage."

Hermione gave him a confused look, which gave Severus the impression she did not understand what he was talking about or what he meant.

"The ministry are introducing arranged marriages with the intention of the couples then procreating in their favour." Severus watched as Hermione's mouth suddenly opened up like a fish. _Did he really just say that? Why is he telling me about this? Surely Dumbledore would have instructed to keep this between them until he wishes students to hear about it._ "I am telling you because I feel as though my circumstances will change with regards to you. It will also include unmarried teachers such as me and I may have to leave employment with the school if I find myself in the position of being selected. So I am just informing you that I will be accepting applications at the end of the year for a potions apprentice. McGonagall told me you were interested in pursuing a career in potions."

"Yes I am, thank you sir."

"Your very welcome Miss Granger," He smiled. "I would appreciate it if you could keep the ministry business between us for now as Dumbledore would surely hex me if he knew I told anyone."

"Of course sir."

"Thank you," He replied curtly. "Now run along and I hope you pass next week's test."

She took off as fast as her feet could carry her without running back to the dormitory. Hermione couldn't quite take it in. The ministry were not happy with 16 year olds running around during the summer hexing each other but they were perfectly contented in the knowledge that they were forcing some of them to become parents with people they may not love? It was truly horrendous to think about and even worse to think if she would be selected.

The following days passed by without the notice of the recent discovery by Hermione. True she was upset but she didn't stress too much about the issue as she knew there was little chance of her being selected as she was muggleborn and she was adamant that the ministry would want pureblood children being born as much as possible. But it all depended on how the ministry was matching people.


	3. Chapter 3

Hi all, somebody reviewed saying they didn't know when the story is set and I re-read it and I realised they were right because I had created this scenario in my head but forgot to make it clearer. So here are just a few points to make it a bit clearer for you and I apologise for the confusion and a massive thank you to the person who reviewed and said so. I would privately message you only you reviewed anonymously.

In third year Hermione found out Severus' past with the marauders and that the past that Hermione mentions.

At this point in the story Albus Dumbledore is the only person who knows of his love for Lilly.

For this story at least Ginny is the same age of the golden trio.

Severus Snape is 37 years old

Based on the trio in half blood prince but only a few major events of the plot line.


	4. Chapter 4

The more Hermione thought about it, the more she realised that she was more surprised at Snape's being kind to her and the ministry forcing people to marry each other. Why had he complimented her by calling her a talented witch? After calling her a know-it-all for the best part of 5 years, it was a big surprise for him to be kind enough as to give her compliment. And the mention of the apprenticeship must mean that he had some kind of interest in her application, if she chose to submit one.

Severus knew he had nearly blown his cover and cursed to himself when Hermione had left. He knew he had complimented her and he needed something to occupy her mind instead of the compliment he gave her. His love for Hermione was nearly let out because he couldn't control himself and his mouth. He didn't know what he could do, he had to find a way of controlling his emotions and disciplining his mind. Severus was distraught with himself and mentally scolded himself for his mistake; and hoped Hermione wouldn't remember or at least not mention it again.

The following days that passed were a nightmare for both sides as they couldn't sleep and were fighting internal wars about the strange behaviour that had passed over the last few days. Severus was still angry with himself for his own stupidity and he couldn't move past it. Hermione on the other hand was trying to think logically. She had come to several conclusions and the one that seemed to be the most popular in her mind was that her potions professor cared for her in some way that she hadn't been aware of before. Then she toyed with the idea that somehow he felt obligated to return the care that she had given him after the incident with professor Lupin. Of course she felt no such agreement or debt was to be paid but she decided to let it be for now and then speak to Snape only if it was necessary.

By Wednesday morning neither of them had seen each other and it was unsurprising as Hermione had been staying in the library for at least 7 hours a day in an attempt to get away from her irritating best friends. She loved her friends dearly but there were times when she needed to have a breather; especially since Ron had decided that he and Hermione were an item despite Hermione having no recollection of such an agreement. However, when Hermione went into the hall for breakfast that morning she was surprised to notice Dumbledore and Snape talking quite closely about something at the top table. Putting it to one side she sat down next to Ginny, facing the boys and wondering what they could possibly be talking about.

"Ronald," Hermione sighed. "Will you please finish whatever is in your mouth before talking. Love you as I do Ron I don't wish to see the contents of your mouth thank you very much."

After perking up at the mention of the word love, Ron nodded and finishing eating what he was currently working on before telling Hermione they were in the midst of an argument about the upcoming welcome ball. Hermione hadn't heard anything about this...

"It announced that Dumbledore would plan a ball, sort of like the party held during the tri-wizard cup." Said Ginny.

"But why?" Hermione whined. "Didn't he realise that last time it cost an absolute fortune and was quite frankly one of the most boring evenings of my life!"

"For you maybe," Harry piped in.

The conversation was cut short by the entrance of Neville; he was carrying a copy of the prophet looking rather like the day he found out that Bellatrix Lastrange had escaped from Azkaban prison. Knowing something was definitely wrong, Ginny helped him to the bench while Hermione took the newspaper from his hands. She could now understand why Neville was so glazed over and concerned. Harry took the paper from her and after reading the first few sentences his thoughts immediately went to Ginny but he tried to focus. Everyone was suddenly gathering round to see the headline.

 _ **Ministry consents to marriage law**_

Dumbledore saw the commotion around the middle of the Gryffindor table and stood up.

"Will the Gryffindor house please settle down?"

After doing so, nobody felt liked eating. Hermione was just staring at the varnish on the table when suddenly the mail arrived. She didn't expect anything; with her parents away for several months and being at school with her friends, she didn't really know anyone else who would write to her. A heavy letter with a wax seal from the ministry landed on her empty plate. No one saw the latter and so, to avoid being noticed, she pushed the letter between the pages of her book and swiftly left the hall.

 **Sorry it's a short chapter guys. I'm shattered I've had placement all day and now I'm ready for bed. I tried to do more for you guys but I came to the conclusion you would prefer a better chapter that was shorter than a long one that hadn't had much thought gone into it. So I hope you guys like it. Night!**


	5. Chapter 5

Severus couldn't help but notice Hermione rush out of the great hall without eating anything. He also saw the owl rush in and drop something around that area but he couldn't tell what it was exactly. He put it towards the back of his mind and decided to get started with his day. His first period was free so he decided to spend the morning marking the first year's essays to assess their writing abilities. Needless to say, he wasn't looking forward to it.

Around an hour into his ordeal there was a tapping on his office window. He found an owl waiting on the ledge with a letter in his beak; to his horror it had a ministry seal and he had a feeling it was due to the recent marriage legislation.

 _Dear Mr Severus Tobias Snape,_

 _You have been selected for an arranged match by the Ministry for Magic. We hope this news is pleasing to you and you will be later notified of your suitable matches. This may take several weeks and as part of this process we request for you to complete the enclosed document. The questionnaire will enable us to determine how you perceive yourself and is crucial for us to find you an acceptable match._

 _Thank you for your cooperation_

 _Amelia Bones_

 _Ministry for Magic_

Severus was horrified and he was currently trying to control his anger at the ministry's total audacity to control the lives of their witches and wizards. How could he be pleased about this news? He was being forced to marry a witch he doesn't even know; it was going to be disastrous. All he could think of was the slight miniscule flicker of hope that he may be matched with Hermione. Severus knew this was an extraordinarily long shot but he had to hope for the best and prepare for the worst.

Hermione had the same letter and was currently crying passionately into her pillow. It was at this moment that Hermione believed her whole life had come to an end. She had no one to turn to that would understand; whilst her friends were worrying about being selected, she was worrying about her whole life because she _had_ been selected. At some point during the 20 minutes she spent crying into her pillow, she thought to herself that this would be it for her she would be forever known as the girl who got married at 16 and nothing else, all because the ministry are more focused on the procreation of more children; instead of just integrating more 11 year olds into magical schools.

Ginny was currently sat in charms and the lesson was about to start; she thought it odd that Hermione had not made an appearance yet. It wasn't like her to be late to a class or to not turn up at all; Ginny put it to the back of her mind and tried to focus.

After noticing Hermione's absence from all her classes that day, McGonagall sent for Severus to help find her. She would search the classrooms while he would look in the Gryffindor tower before searching the astronomy tower. Of course, it was unusual to have a male teacher searching girl's dormitories but everyone was confident in knowledge that Severus would just be interested in getting the job done. However, the mood he was in made him none the friendlier. As he made his way through Gryffindor tower, after McGonagall finally gave him the password, he was surprised to find the common room empty. Then he remembered that the quidditch trials were this evening and everyone must have gone down to the pitch to spectate. He was about to turn to leave when he heard a muffled cry in the background. It was very faint and it sounded as though, whoever it was, they were choking themselves in their own tears.

Sensing distress, Severus ran up the steps two at a time and barged his way into the girl's room and found a student with instantly recognisable brown bushy hair lying on her bed with books thrown everywhere. Hermione had not noticed Severus entering her room and continued to sob. Severus stood for a moment just watching her and then he stepped forward to find the same letter he had been sent lying on her bed. Now it made sense about the books and her absence in class. She had been trying to find a legal way to avoid being obligated to marry a wizard of the ministry's choosing and put the thought of facing others to the back of her mind...just as he had done.

"Miss Granger," Severus murmured. He didn't want to startle her and upset her further.

"Yes sir?" She asked looking up at him. "Is there something you wanted?"

"Your absence was noticed in your classes today," he told her quietly. "McGonagall was very strict in telling me that I must find you as soon as possible and I would hate for anything to happen to her favourite cub, for both of our sakes." He finished with a smile and Hermione let out a small giggle. She knew her head of house's temper and she would hang Severus if she knew that he was lacking in his efforts to find her missing cub.

"I'm sorry sir," she whispered, sitting up. "I was selected by the ministry for an arranged marriage and I just wanted to be alone."

"I understand," Severus nodded. "I received the same letter this morning." He gestured to the letter on the bed.

"I'm sorry professor," started with a sniffle. "I must seem ridiculous to you about this. You're so calm about the situation and here I am crying my eyes out."

"I feel like crying Hermione." He stated simply. Hermione's eyes shot up and looking at him directly. She was surprised at him for using her first name again and at him wanting to cry. He always seemed to be a calm yet confident man who was never afraid to scorn others for the expression of their feelings.

"I only wish there was a silver lining to all this," she thought aloud. Severus thought at that second, _well it's now or never._

"Hermione," he was so nervous his hands were shaking. "There is a small silver lining to all this for me and I hope that it pays off. I only wish it was the same for you."

"What do you mean professor?" she asked. "Have you been matched with woman you care for?"

"No Hermione," Severus began, sitting down on the bed. "I hold onto the small flicker of hope that I will be matched with the woman I have cared for and loved for many years."

"No one can guarantee that you will be able to be with this woman."

"Exactly, which is why I am telling her how I feel before she is matched as well. I may not be matched with her but I hope that enters her new marriage knowing that someone loved her for many years and will continue to do so."

Hermione wiped her eyes and then jumped off the bed. She didn't like that this conversation was getting so deeply emotional and she tried to break the ice a little but found that she was making the situation more awkward.

"I wish you every happiness in doing so sir," She told him whilst trying to avoid eye contact. "We can only hope she loves you as you do for her."

"Hermione..." He got up and slowly made his way to her but made sure he didn't touch her. "I don't wish to make you uncomfortable. I'm sorry I feel this way about you."

She backed away trying to deny her body what she wanted but what she knew wasn't right. "Sir h-how can you f-feel this way?"

"Ever since you saved me that day I realised I had been blind to your beauty and intelligence for so long and that I had loved the wrong woman for a very long time. I loved a woman who was half your ability and brilliance...to this day she doesn't know and she died not knowing that either."

"This i-is wrong," She stepped away until her back reached a wall and she couldn't move back any further. "You're a teacher professor Snape, you can't love a student. It's against the law."

"No its no," He said standing in front of her with arms flat by his sides. "It's illegal to marry a student, but seeing as the ministry seemed to be freezing all laws concerning marriage...I'm not sure that it matters."

"I can't tell you how I feel in return," she said reservedly.

"That's fine," He was relieved that she wasn't entirely repulsed by his feelings. Severus placed his hands on her forearms reassuring her that he didn't expect anything in return.

"Or at least I don't want to just yet"

Severus was totally agreeable and sent Hermione straight to bed to sleep the night away. He left two potions on her bedside for sleeping and to cease all dreams. She thanked him and let him kiss her cheek to say goodnight, knowing what it meant for him to be able to reveal his feelings to her.

That night, the two individuals sat on their beds and though through the conversation that had happened previously. Severus had made the confession that could've drawn her away from him forever and Hermione felt a sense of relief knowing that she was loved and that she had someone waiting for her. Being loved by a teacher was by no means an easy thing to cope with but, she took comfort in the knowledge that these were the same feelings she had felt for the same amount of time. She had spent many years believing that it was a school crush that would be ridiculed by Severus if she ever revealed it.

She had no idea what to do at this point. Hermione had a man confessing his love for her and a marriage obligation hanging over her head. It was only a matter of time before both of these would collide and she would either have to accept a loveless marriage to someone she doesn't care for, or she could have someone she loves marry her and be happy.


	6. Chapter 6

**Sorry for the delay guys. I've been getting organised to get everything sorted before I leave for work. I will be leaving in two weeks to go and work for a company that requires me to stay in a tent for six weeks while I'm there. I've been getting my crap together and sorting stuff so I will have little to do when the time for me to leave actually comes. Unfortunately I won't be taking my laptop as I can't guarantee any type of security there. I will have my phone but I can't be sure I will be able to upload next chapters. I'll be coming home on a few weekends during which I will write up some chapters but I can't promise. Anyway here is the latest chapter, enjoy!**

Hermione woke up in her bed with, surprisingly, plenty of time to spare. It was only 7 in the morning and she had nowhere to be this morning as it was Saturday and the beginning of the October half term. She realised she would be the only one in Gryffindor tower that would not be going home. It wasn't a big deal for her and she decided she would be able to make use of her time wisely and get some extra work done ahead of time. Ginny was currently busy packing quietly. She had woken up early and gotten everything ready as she couldn't be bothered the night before; she had tried to not to wake Hermione.

"Oh sorry," she spoke quietly whilst carrying on packing. "I was trying to be quiet."

"No, its fine gin," Hermione started, getting out of bed. "I had an early night anyway."

"I know you're not yourself lately." Ginny stated simply. Hermione's eyes shot up. "What's the matter?"

With Ginny standing there with one hand on her hip and the other holding a partially folded t-shirt, Hermione knew that Ginny wouldn't leave the castle until she had told her everything. Well at least something to spark her interest.

"I got a letter from the ministry last night," Hermione said. She reached over to her bedside table and passed the letter to Ginny. Her face dropped when she returned to look at Hermione again.

"Have you been told who it will be?"

"No," Hermione replied looking down at her hands and sitting on her bed again.

"Well..." Ginny thought of something. "Try to find something that will occupy your mind until you find out. I know you have done all your homework so far but try to get ahead on potions. You did say you wanted to improve this year."

"That's true," she trailed off.

An hour later she was on the platform waving her friends off. When the train was out of sight, she stood there staring at the tracks. Hermione was breathing deeply and then heard someone behind her.

"Ello 'ermione," she turned and found Hagrid standing there.

"Hi"

"Somfink the matta?" He asked.

"No no," She replied. "But thank you for asking."

He nodded and saw that she wanted to return to the platform and so stepped aside allowing her to pass. Hermione was half way back when she had this sudden idea to go and sit by the lake. She slowly made her way down there and relished the silence of the grounds during the holidays. On a typical day, the magical creatures' professor would be teaching around this area, making it near impossible to study or to just relax. The constant fear of losing a limb or ending up in the hospital wing meant the students were always looking over their shoulder.

Hermione got to the water and thought over the events of last day. Suddenly the conversation she had with Snape and receiving the letter was all too much for her and tears streamed down her face. She cried so hard she couldn't breathe. Hermione's life had become so complicated in the space of a day and now she couldn't focus on her education.

Severus was also enjoying the peace and quiet, throughout the day; until he realised that his life was too, ruined. He knew that there was a near impossible chance that Hermione would ever return his feelings but it didn't stop him from feeling that way. When he sat down with Albus and the other teachers for lunch, he noticed Hermione was not present in the great hall. There were few students so it was easy to see that she was not here but no other teacher questioned it.

Hermione was still by the lake during this time and was completely oblivious to the figure now approaching her.

The figure was dressed in a black robe and had its wand drawn. It moved silently, its feet never touching the ground. Almost gliding, like a vampire. It was sophisticated; a well experienced predator.


	7. Chapter 7

Severus was in his office trying to mark the mock round of tests to be taken by the 5th years in a month's time. He was distracted and couldn't get Hermione Granger out of his mind. It bothered him that she wasn't at any of the meals that day. Severus decided to search the castle using legilimens. He sat back in his chair and closed his eyes. Focusing on finding the nearest open and unaware mind. It found the mind of 7th year hufflepuff that was currently engaged in a lip locking battle with a younger 5th slytherin. He shook it off and carried on searching.

After popping in and out of several individual's minds he was still searching for Hermione. He could not find her anywhere and was beginning to panic. Leaning forward in his seat with one hand on the armrest, Severus was now widening his search. He couldn't see directly into the minds of those who were not in the castle but he could sense there was a panicking mind out near the lake and they needed assistance. Even if it wasn't Hermione, he would've apparated anyway.

He found himself near the lake with a screaming in the distance. With his wand drawn, Severus advanced. The closer he got to the lake the louder the scream became. His feet suddenly met the clearing in front of the water and he looked to his right and found two individuals lying down in the mud. The woman underneath was clearly distressed and couldn't shift the black figure that was currently leaning on her arms and trying to rip at her shirt.

The two individuals were two occupied in one way or another to notice him coming towards them.

"PLEASE"

"Shut it, mudblood"

Then it hit Severus. It was Hermione underneath this figure...whoever he was.

"Expelliarmus," Severus muttered the spell so to prevent the attacker from further harming his victim and soon he found himself with sudden possession of Filch's wand.

Hermione was still on the floor at this point and with her attacker now occupied by a different matter, she tried to wriggle out from underneath him. Only this was stopped by his hand pressing rather hard onto her neck causing her to freeze in her position, still in the mud. Filch brought them both to their feet.

"Severus my dear friend," He started. "What brings you to our little party?"

"I've come for Hermione"

"Whatever could you want her for?"

"I could ask you the same thing."

"We were just having a good time weren't we me lovie?"

Hermione's head, lip and nose was bleeding and she was now beginning to get a foggy looking vision. Her wand had been thrown far away and she could just about see that Severus had it cradled in his hand along with Flich's. Her shirt was ripped and filch had obviously had a good go at removing he jeans as well. It suddenly became too much for Hermione to cope with and she blacked out and lost the use of her limbs, essentially losing consciousness. It felt strange to her because she could hear everything around her and could still hear the conversation between Flich and Severus after Flich threw her to the floor.

"STUPEFY" Screamed Severus and Hermione heard another body hit the ground.

Severus took a moment to stare at the two people in front of him. The ground was covered in mud and the two individuals currently lying in it would soon be unable to move if they remained there much longer. Even thought a large part of him wanted to beat Flich till he was black and blue, Severus scooped up Hermione and apparated to the hospital wing. After explaining what had happened to poppy he went to find the headmaster; only to be cut up by his appearance by hermione's bedside.

"Good evening Severus," Dumbledore greeted him. "Would you like to explain tonight's events concerning Miss Granger here?"

"I found her being attacked by Flich down near the lake. Last I saw him he was unconscious."

"I see..." He replied. "I trust you have his wand Severus?"

"I do headmaster," Severus replied handing it over.

"I do not wish to know the extent of the incident but if it is punishable by law, the dementors will have already removed him from the grounds. Happily I was informed of Flich's departure from the grounds shortly before arriving here."

Severus breathed a sigh of relief. For now he needed to disappear; he didn't believe that Hermione would want him to be the first person she sees when she woke up...


	8. Chapter 8

Hermione woke the following morning feeling very sore all over. Still unaware of what happened the previous evening, she tried to get out of bed after realising she was in the hospital wing. Only she was suddenly scolded by Madam Pomfrey the moment her foot touched the cold floor. After an hour of being in bed, did Hermione begin to piece together what had happened last night.

She remembered being attacked by Filch

And having her clothes ripped

Oh and her wand being thrown to one side

Then his face came into her head, that face she couldn't ignore. Severus had come for her last night to make sure she was safe. He must be the one who had brought her to Pomfrey. Her eyes suddenly noticed her wand sitting on the bedside table along with a glass of water and her school books. _Trust him to know._ After finally convincing herself that Severus did indeed save her that night she requested to send him a note. Hermione put up a fight and was finally granted permission.

 _Severus,_

 _Apologies for using your christen name only I wish to thank you personally for your assistance last night and would be grateful if you could come to the hospital wing at your earliest convenience._

 _Hermione_

 _P.S. Pomfrey is over my shoulder_

Severus read note whilst stroking the snowy white owl that had carried it and chuckled at the last line. He had spent most of the night sitting at his desk doing nothing but thinking, for no particular reason. He thought about things that were completely irrelevant to what had previously happened; he thought it must be lack of sleep messing about with his mind.

After finally making himself presentable for the first time in about 15 hours, Severus made his way to the hospital wing where he would hopefully be able to talk to Hermione without the pressure of his feelings in the atmosphere; although he knew this would be unlikely.

"Hermione?" He called softly.

"Hmmm," was all he heard. Poking his head around the curtains of Hermione's bed he found her dozing with her eyes closed. _So beautiful._ He thought to himself, her hair was spread around her head all over the pillow and framed her face perfectly. As if Severus needed anymore encouragement to love her...

Stepping forward, he was quiet and making sure not to disturb her. All this was quickly made redundant when he gave in to temptation and stroked her forehead causing her to face him. To his surprise, Hermione snuggled into Severus' hand and looked content with her face leaning into his hand.

"Mmmm," She began. "Severus?"

"Yes?" He replied, crouching down to her level.

"I don't know what happened last night...Or at least most of what happened." She yawned halfway through this little speech but never once opened her eyes. _Probably best, she would make it even worse and make me want to kiss her._ "But thank you for everything you did."

"It's-"

"Oh and sorry for using your christen name. I never asked permission." Severus chuckled and this made Hermione open her eyes slightly to see Severus Snape chuckling. She raised her head slightly and smirked at him. "What?"

"It's perfectly alright for you to call me Severus." He smiled as she rested her head back into his hand. "But not in class mind," He said in jest with a slightly stern face.

"Is it uncomfortable for you to be here?"

"Whatever do you mean?"

"To speak plainly sir," she began releasing his hand. "If I was sat next to the man I'd saved the night before and I knew I loved him, I know I'd feel uncomfortable knowing my affections weren't returned."

This crushed Severus' heart completely. He felt his face drop at the sound of her admitting she didn't love him and probably never would. Yet she felt so comfortable and relaxed around him which caused confusion on his side. After taking a split second to decide to leave, Hermione interrupted his thoughts.

"You can rest assured that...," She paused. "I-...I care for you Severus. More than I thought I would."

Severus' heart stopped. Could he be hearing this right? Hermione noticed this and made a point.

"I can't say that I love you," She said softly. "But I can say that...I will always care for you at the very least."

Severus was so very contented at this and was so grateful to Hermione for having the courage to admit it. After being shooed out of the hospital wing by Pomfrey; he made his way back to his office with a spring in his step. Sitting still would be impossible at that moment and as if the moment were too good to be true, Albus stepped through his fireplace.

"My dear boy!" He scolded Severus when he saw he was pacing with a big smile on his face. "How can you smile at a time like this?"

Unsure of what the old coot was talking about, Severus instantly dropped his smile of happiness and instead bore the face of sheer dread. The moment had been so perfect with Hermione, he could not have asked for a more perfect moment in his whole life and now he had a horrid feeling in his gut that something was about to go horribly wrong.

When Severus' face dropped Albus knew then it would be the right time to hand him the letter that was delivered by mistake to his office. He hadn't opened it, as he had respect for other wizard's privacy and personal business. It didn't stop his concern however, for the seal was the seal of the ministry.

 **Hey guys! Long time no see! I've been working away since june and I'm finally back and writing for you all. I have 6 months before I go to uni and so I am dedicating every spare minute to writing new chapters! If you're following me as an author, rest assured I will be updating almost all my stories! Hopefully I will entertain you all. Hope you enjoyed this little chapter and I'll have one ready for Monday. Much love too all and thank you for your continued support!**


	9. Chapter 9

Hermione was now in her bed in Gryffindor tower; she hadn't seen or heard anything from Severus in days and she was afraid she had ruined her 'friendship' with him. She had a several days before the students returned from their break. Granted there were students still at the castle other than herself but no one of any consequence and she hardly saw anyone other than a member of staff. After being discharged from the hospital wing, she had taken the time to rest more than usual and use the time available to her, to reflect on what had happened the other night with Filch.

She had yet to her of any news concerning him but all she knew was that he was removed from the grounds by dementors. After spending the morning in bed, Hermione went in search of Severus. After not hearing from him for some time, she decided she would investigate; and what better place to start than with his office? When Hermione arrived at Severus' office door she could hear him cursing rather loudly and then a loud *BANG*.

"Wretched thing!" Was all she heard. Knowing it was a bad time but deciding that she didn't care, Hermione knocked on the door.

Severus had been having such a whirlwind of emotion these last few days. He had hermione's attack to deal with, her admitting she felt something for him and now he had a whole other part of that to process. He told himself he wasn't to be trusted around the students or other members of staff at that moment in time so he decided to stay put in his office. He hadn't thought that anyone would notice and he certainly wouldn't have thought that Hermione would come looking for him.

Severus was having the best yet worse day of his life. He had been having mixed emotions due to feeling and reality all clashing together becoming one. Sitting still was, again, impossible; soon Severus found himself walking into one of his bookcases causing a rather large volume on magical creatures to land straight onto his foot. Now this caused Severus to curse...rather a lot. Then in his frustration, he decided to kick the rather large volume on magical creatures with the same foot it had landed on causing him further pain. Now to anyone watching the spectacle they would have found it hard not to snigger but Severus found satisfaction in yelling at the inanimate object.

Seconds later he heard a soft knock on the door; feeling in no mood for mindless chit chat he gave the visitor a piece of his mind. Or at least he was going to until he saw who was on the other side of the door. Suddenly the pain his foot was unimportant as he looked upon the girl who was currently staring at the floor in embarrassment and still had marks on her face from Filch.

Severus softened instantly and offered his hand to her just inside her eye level. Taking his hand, Hermione looked up at him and wanted to speak although no words were formed. He gently pulled her into his office and lead her to the sofa where she could be comfortable. There was an awkward silence but to his surprise, Hermione broke it first.

"Thank you for coming to see me," She said finally looking into his eyes. "and sorry you were caught by madam pomfrey."

After a short a giggle from them both Severus replied. "I was glad to see you in one piece. I would've come sooner if I thought I would be welcome. I feared you would not like to see my face so soon."

"How can you say that?!" she replied a little louder than intended. "The attack was not your fault Severus. You saved me, how can you think you would not be welcome."

"I was not talking of the attack, Hermione"

"Oh," She replied in response, knowing instantly what he meant.

"Have you received a letter from the ministry in the last few days?"

"Professor Dumbledore has been taking my post for me, allowing me to rest"

"Ahh, I see," He sighed. "I didn't want to be the person to tell you this..."

"Is something the matter?" She reached over and placed her hand atop of his. Severus took Hermione's hand in his own and gave it a slight squeeze before taking a deep breath.

"I have received word of my current match status from the ministry," He began. "If you remember I told you I had always cared for you and I hoped-"

"That the woman you would be matched with...would be me," she finished. This allowed him to recognise that she understood exactly where this was going.

"I have been matched with two people Hermione and I have been given permission to choose between yourself and another witch I have never met before in my life. I do not recognise the name at all."

"Why haven't I heard of this?" She demanded still holding tight of his hand. Before Severus answered he took both of her hands in his and moved closer towards her with barely two inches between them.

"I'm guessing because they've given me the choice of choosing between two women," he said hesitantly. "I suppose they do not want to inform you of anything until I've made my decision."

"Severus," she said softly to stop him from ranting on. "Tell me truthfully, are you going to choose me?"

"Not if you don't want me to." He stated simply.

"What do you mean?"

"I will not choose you unless you wish it. I won't control your life decisions Hermione. I don't want to tell you who to care for or who to marry. I would be contented to know that you were happier with someone else than miserable married to me."

A long pause echoed throughout the room. Severus gave her the time to process what had been said.

"I would rather be married to someone who loves me," She said finally. "Instead being married to someone I didn't know with any chance of love. I know I'm young and this may sound foolish, but I want to marry you Severus. I know you love me and I care for you already, we can both be confident in the knowledge that love would almost certainly follow."

"Are you trying to tell me that you might love me Hermione?"

"I think I may love you already, and for longer than I ever knew possible."

 **OOHH what do you think guys? Sorry for leaving it there but I thought this would be a good stopping point before I carry on. I am absolutely loving this pairing and I have been writing like mad for days in an attempt to get ahead and note some ideas down. Keep an eye out for the next chapter...much love! xx**


	10. Chapter 10

The conversation ended when Severus could sense that Hermione's nervousness. She hadn't expected to feel this way for sometime or at least come to the realisation that she did indeed love him in return. Hermione always had a schoolgirl crush on her professor since he saved her life several years ago and now she was sure that she loved him since spending more time with him. The more time she had spent with him and allowed him to know her, she had allowed him to grow on her. She began to consider if her schoolgirl crush was more than a crush and was actually a development of feelings that had been oblivious to her for years.

There wasn't any talking for several minutes, just hand holding without either party daring to look up to meet the other's eyes.

"Severus," Hermione whispered. "I'm sorry."

"Why are you apologising?" He asked, very surprised that she should be sorry.

"In truth," she answered. "I haven't got a clue. I feel as though there is something I must apologise for. Although, I don't know what."

"Hermione," Severus began with a sigh. "You know my feelings but I won't subject you to a marriage with a man you do not love."

"But you would wish that upon another woman?" She shot back.

"No that isn't what I mean." He replied. "My focus is entirely on you. If you do not wish for me to sign my name for your hand then I won't. If I end up married to the other woman I will give her respect and be content in knowing I did everything within my power to prevent you from committing to a marriage you wouldn't be happy in."

"If you don't sign for me," Hermione began looking right into his eyes. "You will cause me to be married to someone I do not love."

"Hermione you need to be serious about this." Severus was now talking a lot more firmly but with love in his voice. He truly wanted the best for her and wasn't prepared to trap her. "This isn't something we would be able to walk away from. If we married they would expect us to produce children. Would you be able to commit to this knowing that?"

"...Yes"

Suddenly the gap between them was closed by Hermione's rash thinking. _This will convince him surely, and I had better do it now otherwise I would be going mad!_ As her lips met his, their minds were completely clear from all other thoughts and suddenly everything was oh so simple. She cared for him and was sure she loved him; he wanted to protect her from making any decisions that she would regret and this is what made them so perfect. With Lilly, Severus had never had this kind of experience; she had always considered him to be a friend and no more than that. When he realised his feelings for Hermione he knew straight away that this would so much different and this was an individual that had always listened to him and not just on what he was teaching her in class.

Their lips were currently taking any kind of attention they had and now they were only focused on pleasure. They needed each other and Severus had all the confirmation he needed to know that Hermione was completely aware of the choices facing her and the consequences that came as part of that. No one had ever kissed Severus willingly. Unfortunately a part of his spying for Dumbledore meant that the deatheaters expected him to partake in their 'hobbies' which included abusing women and sometimes men to within an inch of their lives.

This was something he had never thought he would experience ever in his lifetime after the things he had done. Of course he hadn't wanted to do any of it but he owed it to Dumbledore for preventing the death of the woman he thought he loved.

When the kiss finally ended, Severus took Hermione over to his desk and sat the letter down in the middle clear as day. Neither of them spoke a single word and so Severus picked up his quill. Hermione wanted him to know that this decision was something they would do together so she covered his hand with her own and together they signed the letter with Severus' name. Minutes later the letter was ready to be sent. Severus lead them both out onto his balcony that overlooked the black lake and as if on cue a snowy white owl appeared on the edge. Hermione was overwhelmed by the view at first but even more so by this beautiful bird that resembled Hedwig in so many ways.

Severus gave the bird the letter and it flew off into the night and in the shadow of its flight, stood two lovers kissing with nothing but passion in the cool night air.


	11. Chapter 11

Severus received confirmation of his match to Hermione several days later. They hadn't seen much of each other since that night due to Dumbledore keeping them busy with their different duties. Severus had been preparing himself for the next suicidal mission Albus would send him on. Whilst Hermione was finally sifting through her post and beginning her homework that had been neglected over the week since the students had been home.

It was now the last night and to his surprise Severus was not summoned by the dark lord and wasn't needed by Albus for any reason. He went in search of Hermione, to take advantage of the quiet castle on the last night available to them. Any normal person would look in the library if they wanted Hermione for any reason but Severus knew better and found her in the Gryffindor common room. Or at least he thought he would, but when he requested permission to enter the portrait was being extremely difficult with him and suddenly called for the only individual who was in Gryffindor tower.

When the portrait opened Hermione popped her head out and when met with Severus' face, smiled and immediately held out her hand blocking the door from closing on him. Taking her hand, Severus led them into the room and found the settee covered in paper and books.

"You work too hard," He told Hermione affectionately. She was now clearing the sofa giving Severus a good view of her behind covered in tight jeans.

"Some would say I don't work hard enough," She replied now sitting down. "Although I do wish I hadn't left it all so late."

"We both know you could pass all your essays in a single day with only a few words covering the page." Severus told her as he sat down. Her hair was slightly less frizzy tonight, he noticed. "I haven't anything to do this evening."

"Well I do," She told him playfully leaning forward. He took this opportunity and stole a kiss allowing her to pull back when she wanted to.

Hermione had been working hard to try and get everything done for when she was back in classes and now it was Saturday night and she was just about done but she wanted little extras included. This way her professors would not expect her to be distracted by her new engagement, when it would be announced; or so she hoped. Severus had completely disregarded this plan of hers and was now well truly distracting her.

"I know but you can finish tomorrow," He returned in the same playful tone. "Besides I have about 300 students to order around tomorrow evening and I would like to spend this one with you while we still can."

"How would this evening be spent then?" She asked leaning into him with her back coming into contact with his chest.

"I'm not entirely certain," Severus replied honestly. "I know I just wanted to be with you tonight."

She sat up suddenly assuming his meaning entirely wrong. Severus clicked onto this instantly and placed his hand on her shoulder to reassure Hermione he wouldn't be doing anything remotely close to what she was thinking.

"No," he calmed her. "I wouldn't ever suggest such a thing. Hermione I love you and that means I must respect you as well and I won't do anything with you unless we both consent to it."

"I'm sorry...I suppose I still have the mind of a hormonal young teenager at times."

"I won't comment on that but I will say I didn't feel very different when I was your age. It's just what happens and its nothing to be embarrassed about."

"I'm sorry I made that assumption about you Severus."

Lifting her chin to meet their eyes he spoke softly. "It's alright, think no more of it." She instantly felt relieved. "I received confirmation of our engagement several days ago."

"Oh?"

"Yes," Severus continued. "I only received a letter confirming it but nothing regarding the planning the legalising of our marriage."

"Well we aren't in a rush," Hermione commented. "The world isn't going to end because we aren't married yet. The important thing is we know we have both found another individual who cares for us enough to love us."

"Yes," He agreed. "I know you don't have an engagement ring yet but-"

"Oh no Severus I never expected one." She cut him off. "I'm happy knowing we are going to be married."

"I'm going to give you my mother's ring," Severus murmured quietly. Hermione was shocked and suddenly felt a sense of guilt due to cutting him off mid-sentence. "I don't expect you to accept the gift so feel no guilt if you do not like it."

"Do you not already have it?"

"No, it's in my residence in spinner's end. I have yet to leave the grounds to retrieve it. I haven't yet had the opportunity to do so."

"Ahh I see," Hermione paused. "Well I didn't expect a ring Severus but I would be honoured to wear your mother's ring; especially as it would mean so much to you."

"Thank you Hermione"

The moment was perfect. They had each other and nothing in the world needed their attention. Severus leaned in and gently went for her lips only to be cut of just before reaching them by her cheek. Hermione smirked at him when he pulled away and then gave him a face of pure innocence. Deciding that they both waited long enough for a moment together Hermione finally gave him her lips and went one step further and straddled his lap as she did so. With his hands resting on her hips, Hermione felt the safest she ever had before.

Severus was still in disbelief. He knew there would be an almost impossible chance of him being matched with Hermione and he was sure she wouldn't ever care for him or even love him. Yet here they were in the most heated tonsil tennis session they'd had to date.

The remainder of the evening was spent talking and sharing the intimacy. When Severus had to finally leave in the early hours of the morning, Hermione begged him to stay and almost cried with joy when he finally relented. They had mutually agreed that love-making would not be considered at this stage to allow the relationship to develop at their own pace. The couple were still unsure of how much the ministry would be involved in the practicalities in their marriage so they left their love-making decisions for as late as possible. This was mainly because they had just entered a relationship together so therefore a certain level of intimacy was expected on both sides.

Severus stripped down to his black boxers and Hermione had a certain feeling that she would favour greatly over the coming months. She decided that a strappy top and shorts would be suitable and when she returned from the bathroom she found Severus already lying on the bed. Only he had transfigured it to almost three times the size it was previously and looking pretty proud of himself. He was currently lying in the middle of the bed on his stomach watching her with a rather husky look in his eye.

"Anyone would think it was already our wedding night," Hermione giggled throwing her wash bag somewhere unimportant as she approached the bed. As she leaned forward onto it, Severus turned on his side to allow her to snuggle into him for a moment before deciding they should be under the duvet.

"We don't have to attend breakfast tomorrow morning," Severus whispered. He was gifted with a confused look in return. "The staff are expected to prepare for the coming students tomorrow morning and aren't required anywhere else. I'm sure no one will suspect anything if you don't turn up for one morning."

Severus had a twinkle in his eye and Hermione really loved this cheeky and almost risky side to Severus. Whilst growing up at Hogwarts she had always imagined him to be a very organised and a get-things-done person.

"Severus I need your promise on something," Hermione whimpered.

"Is something the matter?" Severus asked leaning up on his arm to look at her properly.

"Well its partially to do with what happened with Flich." She replied, leaning up as he was.

"I had forgotten about the incident," Severus murmured with his voice significantly deeper on the word _incident._

"I don't know what happened to him and honestly I never wish to know," Hermione spoke with a clear voice. "I trust you but I need to know that you won't touch me in places I don't consent to whilst I'm asleep."

Severus placed his spare hand on Hermione's spare shoulder as a reassuring gesture. "I won't touch you in any way that you don't wish me too. As I said I wouldn't touch you unless you asked."

"Then hold me?"

And he did, every time she asked.

 **Here's the latest guys. Please review for me so I know how I am doing and if you guys are still enjoying this story. This is the most fluffy story I have ever written and I have to say, I am actually enjoying it. Please give me your thoughts and I would appreciate it soooo much. Much love x**


	12. Chapter 12

Hi Guys,

I'm so sorry about my lack of updates, i recently recieved quite a hurtful comment on my instagram page where i talk about my pairings for different fandoms and stories and things. It's knocked me for six and I it's really made me...i wouldnt say upset but very thoughtful on some of the pairings i support.

The individual commented that all severus and hermione shippers are committing paedophilia by supporting this pairing. To which i thought does that count to my support of the marianne/colonel brandon, From jane austen's Sense and Sensibility, pairing as well?

I just feel very low right now and i thought you all deserved to know why. i will try to get myself back into the writing mode but im finding it very hard at the moment. I have also had a major c#ck up at work which has loaded even more stress on me so i will be back soon guys i promise. It's just been a bit hard to stay focused on the positives right now.

Much Love

Softgentle

xxx


	13. Chapter 13

Hermione had never been an anxious person but when she woke the following morning and found just a note from Severus instead of the man himself, her nerves began to get the best of her.

 _Hermione,_

 _Unfortunately I was called to the dark lord earlier than expected and I didn't want to wake you. I have returned safely and you can find me in my office in the morning. If I ever get called again when in your company, don't contact Dumbledore. He doesn't know of our relationship just wait for my owl. I will send it when I am back._

 _Severus_

After a sigh of relief Hermione found herself in the bathroom trying to tame her wild curls. She just about managed to get them under control after she washed it last night. It never seemed to stay in neat curls for long before sleep would turn it almost afro like. Even though Severus and she had found a comfortable middle ground since becoming engaged, she still knew there was much they had to explore before they would be happy.

Hermione spent a few minutes processing everything that had happened since this law had come into conversation and the more she thought back the more she realised that herself and Severus barely knew each other. She had made an insane assumption when he visited last night just upon his words; suddenly feeling very lonely and guilty for what she had felt and said, Hermione went in search of Severus.

Severus had been and returned from the dark lord and found himself unable to sleep. A muggle man had been found on the Malfoy's lands through his accidental lack of map reading skills. He looked like your typical Englishman who enjoys walking his dog through farming lands, only to be killed for pleasure by bellatrix. If the dark lord discovered Severus' true motives and loyalties he would be given the same punishment in a heartbeat and he carried on with his part in the order knowing that.

It suddenly sprung on him that it wouldn't just be him in this situation now. Hermione would have to come first because Severus felt deep in his heart that Hermione shouldn't be in danger due to his own personal choices. It had crossed his mind whether he should cease performing this double act for Dumbledore and instead focus on his upcoming marriage; and the inevitable children that would follow.

*Tap*Tap*Tap*

Without even hesitating as to who could be visiting at such an early hour, Severus yanked his office door open and pulled Hermione inside. When inside Hermione found herself scared to touch him at all. Unbeknownst to him, Severus had removed his mask but left his death eater robes on.

"Oh!" He exclaimed quietly. "Sorry I have been back for a little while. I just left the note for you and came straight here without thinking."

"It's alright," She replied, feeling instantly more comfortable knowing he was now in his usual attire. "Are you alright?" Still not moving towards him.

"I'm fine"

"Why do you get called to the dark lord?" She asked quietly looking at her hands, avoiding his gaze wherever possible.

"Because-"

"Are you a death eater?" She blurted out, cutting him off.

"Yes of sorts," He replied. Severus regretted the blunt reply as soon as the words left his mouth. Hermione was now standing with her hands by her sides looking as if she had been betrayed.

"Why?" She whispered.

"Hermione it's not all as it seems," Severus slowly reached for her hand and was surprised when she allowed him to take it. "I hate to use the muggle term but it is not what it looks like. I can assure you."

"Will you tell me what you're doing? Please?" Hermione begged.

"I...I can't," He sighed pulling her towards him. "Not without jeopardising your safety."

"Can you tell me where your loyalties lie?" She was offering a compromise; Severus suddenly thought this marriage business wouldn't be too difficult after all.

"Dumbledore," He stated simply. "But now my task is to protect you, that will come first and if I have to leave Dumbledore to his own devices to do that, then that's what I'll do."

"You're working for Dumbledore?" She questioned him.

"Shh," Severus whispered. "If I tell you everything you will be in danger."

"But I'm in danger now by agreeing to marry a man who is a death eater!" She suddenly cried.

"Hermione I promise you, you will not be in danger if you are ignorant to that side of my life. The moment I tell you is the moment we might have to leave and your parents will be in danger."

Hermione hesitated and just stood there looking at Severus for a moment. She knew that their union would be considered, unusual; but she never considered that this would be something to consider also.

"This is a shock Severus," She began, walking towards him with her arms folded. "Surely you cannot deny that."

"No and I wouldn't expect you to just accept it without asking at least one question." He said with a smile when she looked him in the eye.

"I won't ask any more questions," She said with a sigh in her voice. "But will you tell me if we are in danger? If I need to leave, will you tell me why then?"

"Of course," Severus replied. He closed the gap between them and held her forearms for effect.

"Now make me some breakfast to make up for your disappearance last night." Hermione teased with a wink.

Severus let out a hearty laugh when she squealed as he lifted her off her feet. No kisses were exchanged during this encounter and Severus couldn't help but notice. He grew increasingly worried throughout the morning as they continued to enjoy the privacy but she seemed to be almost on edge around him.

It was 2 in the afternoon and they were lounging in his sitting room in front of the fire. The cold January weather had gotten to the both of them and the warmth of the fire had made them sleepy. For over an hour the couple had settled with Severus underneath Hermione with her head on his chest and his hand stroking her hair.

"Kiss me." It was a desperate plea and to his surprise it was Hermione who was begging to be kissed. She has her chin resting on his chest and her hand on his cheek. He closed the gap once again and let his lips run across hers causing a moan to leave her, before he finally applied the right amount of pressure and kissed her soundly.

Severus surprised himself with his own confidence and licked along her bottom lip; he gasped when he felt her cold hands feeling up and down his chest encouraging him to remove his shirt. For a moment he wondered what would happen.

Only for a moment...


End file.
